no country for over-explainers

have you read cormac mccarthy's no country for old men?  

i read it on a sleeper train to charleston south carolina.  helluva book, even having seen the movie five times. most notable thing about it?  every page i couldn't help but think, "masterful." masterfully simple.    

why does this matter?  

well, if you're a writer you know how easy it is to over-explain. we all do it. we fear our readers won't understand us.  we like to show off.  whatever the case, mccarthy is a pro at not doing it.  

here's a convo between Moss, a texas bumpkin who stole $2M from a dead mexican after a bum dope deal, and Wells, a hit man visiting him in the hospital. Wells talks first.   

~

What do you do, he said.

What?

What do you do.

I'm retired.

What did you do before you retired?

I'm a welder.

Acetylene?  Mig?  Tig?

Any of it.  If it can be welded I can weld it.

Cast iron?

Yes.

I don't mean braze.

I didn't say braze.  

Pot metal?

What did I say?

~  

now even if you don't give a hoot about welding, isn't it interesting how if you pick the right words for dialogue, the conversation stands alone.  without writerly explanations.

when i write dialogue, i find i've gotta go back numerous times to cut meaningless words and replace bland words with sharper words to ensure the dialogue drives itself--sans explanation.    

what about you?  what tricks do you use to keep your prose sharp?   

posted by: david bonck